Me, A Racist?

I subbed High School French today, so help me GOD! Let me just start by saying that students call me their “funnest, most favorite, but most strictest” of all subs…and today was no exception. I spent the day painfully listening to kids butcher French in the worst way. I came home with a headache and I can’t imagine why. Maybe it was the way the kids failed at memorizing basic vocabulary OR the way they acted. Ha.

Rule Number One: You may NOT send text messages or play games during class. If I see you doing this I will take your phone. This is your warning. (A handful of kids put the phones in their backpacks or pockets. The OTHER students left the phones on their desks…dangerous.)

So a BLACK 10th grade boy decided to play a game while I wasn’t looking. And so I walked up and took the phone away. Lawd have mercy you’d think I took his very life! And do you know what popped out of his mouth?

“You took that cause I was BLACK didn’t you?” (Please note he said WAS. Seriously annoying.)

Me: “Are you for reals? You think it’s cause you’re black? Boy, you picked the WRONG teacher to accuse of racism since I’m married to a BLACK man. I don’t care if you’re black and I’m white. Clearly I don’t have a problem with it!” So I took the phone. And a girl freaked out. “That’s MY phone.”

Me: Well he was playing a game on it.
Him: Take my phone, I took hers.
Her: I didn’t know he took it.
Me: Well why was it on the table? Your phone is YOUR responsibility.
Her: But I didn’t KNOW.
Him: She didn’t know I SWEAR.
Me: I don’t care. I said no phones. If you had had your phone put away he wouldn’t have been playing with it.

She got her phone back at the end of class. I didn’t have any more phone problems for the rest of the day. By 8th period word had gotten out…

Another kid told me that he couldn’t speak to me in French because he only spoke Russian! Ha, this happens to be a language I know, so I responded in Russian. He couldn’t understand  me and told me he “made a mistake, it is Croatian he knows.” Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

Yet another girl told me that even though she’s in French II she can’t speak French, sadly SHE only speaks Arabic. So I responded with the limited Arabic that I know and she had ZERO clue what I was saying.

She: What did you just say? For real?
Me: If you didn’t understand me, you certainly don’t speak Arabic.

I don’t know folks. COME ON!? And this is the tip of the ice berg of my French subbing stories….from TODAY! More stories to come!

Q is posting Monday! Have a great weekend!

Categories: Education | Tags: | 18 Comments

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18 thoughts on “Me, A Racist?

  1. Holy cow. First, I had no idea you sub’d. Second, who are these demon kids?! Seriously! My kids will have it coming if they even THINK of acting like that!

  2. Clarissa Trapp

    Subbing is not a job for the faint of heart!
    Also, cell phones are such an irritation. I have a friend in a masters of ed program, and get this. She said that in a lecture about classroom control and how to deal with cell phones, most of the FUTURE TEACHERS in the room were on their cells! What is is about cell phones and not being able to put them away?!
    Last point: I love that you are a multilingual woman! Way to thwart laziness and lies!

  3. I’m sure they told their friends that you could speak in all sorts of languages and would steal their phones! I don’t think phones should even be allowed in sight in school.
    When I was a high school senior I tutored a seventh grade math class it and was almost the death of me!

  4. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I love EVERYTHING about this post. You had me cracking up so hard! You’re the teacher that can’t be beat!!! I just love it.

  5. omgoodness, this is a crazy story! first of all, do kids really keep their phones on their desks nowadays!? i dont know if i could handle that as a teacher.
    and second, you GO GIRL for putting those kids in their place – especially the arabic and russian speaking ones. lol.

  6. Oh the joys! I’m definitely not cut out for that business.

  7. You are such a badass, La!!!! I love your no BS attitude with those snotty kids. I love that you know a bazillion languages too. Shoot, back in my daym if we even had a cell phone in school (which I didn’t have until the very end of my senior year, and then only for emergencies), it was not to be SEEN or it was taken away!

  8. Haha! This is awesome and sounds so much like every day I teach COLLEGE students. Ugh. Some people.

    I take away cell phones too and it amazes me how connected to those things people are. You’d think you stole their kid.

    How awesome that you can speak so many languages.

  9. I love that you responded to them in languages that you know and they had no idea. Maybe they learned a lesson about lying…we can hope, right?

  10. Way to lay down the law!!! What a stressful day, incredible! Can’t wait for you to share more stories…:)

  11. That is funny! I bet his face was priceless when you told him Q was black. Oh high school…I don’t miss it one bit but I loved working in a high school and laughing at all the drama they create for themselves. More stories please 😉

  12. Jessca

    I think you may have had some of my kids in there. Just sayin’. 🙂 Sorry for the annoying day, but way to (proverbially) whip those those kids into shape!

  13. This was such a fun post to read! I know it probably wasn’t funny to you at the time.

  14. I can only imagne all the other stories you must have!

  15. Let me get this straight… you are on vacation visiting your parents in Texas and you substituted at a school??

    Okay, just wondering… I forgot that you are a teacher, but some posts from the olden days are coming back to me now. 🙂

    I love reading your posts! Interesting and entertaining.

    P.S. I’m finally using our Y membership on a more regular basis now. It feels great too! The girls just have to understand that Momma needs her alone time, even just for an hour a few days a week. At least it’s a start! You have inspired me, and I hope to try a body detox one of these weeks – my body is begging me! I have some more research to do and need more recipes before I attempt that. 😉

  16. That’s amazing… Are you going to start subbing a lot?

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