I Pooped Roses Today!

My facebook feed is full of chronic rose poopers (remember they poop rainbows and roses), chronic complainers, and over sharing mommies. I had a “friend” update EVERY day during her NINE day potty training mission. I’m not sure if she wanted accolades OR a place to complain, but no one else seemed to know what to do as she had 10 likes and no comments. What do you say to, “Yay, he’s only on his FIFTH pair of underwear!”…?

THEN, we have the snow haters. Snow haters in winter. I don’t understand this.  I DO understand when it is supposed to be Spring, and we all are having remaining snow storms, and your pasty skin is CRYING audibly for vitamin D, your children are so stir crazy you find them in bathing suits – in the snow – and you want to rip your hair out, yah, you can post about it.

Selfies.  And I’m not talking about the awesome selfie you took while sky diving or next to the world’s largest tomato. I’m talking about when you CLEARLY spent time on your hair and makeup, AND placed a mysterious pout on your lips with the caption, “I’m fat, single and ugly!”  I know you don’t believe it, and I hate seeing the 80 “likes” encouraging you on your self-deprecating awesomeness.

I COULD hide these people. I could. But, I do care about their other 20% posts…moving jobs, family, babies…

On to better things – like guac. Chipotle is getting rid of it? How can it be too expensive? We pay like 2 dollars EXTRA for a small dollop! Apparently we are “all freaking out for nothing,” but seriously? They already cut EVERY portion they could. They now give you HALF a scoop of rice and glare at you, coupled with an angry sneer, if you dare to ask for more. BUT since they are in the people serving business, they drop a couple more grains in your bowl and move on. Well they move on to the next patron… while YOU move on to the cash register and pay 10$ per grain of rice.

We bought a camera. It is awesome. I need to buy a cord to get the pictures OFF. Better do that before baby comes next MONTH.

Categories: Crazy Town, Friends | Tags: | 2 Comments

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2 thoughts on “I Pooped Roses Today!

  1. Bethany

    If facebook didn’t exist, then folks who wanted to share with us (like you do) would need to have a blog or email distribution list, and put some thought into their monologue. Pretty much like you usually do. And I would enjoy it immensely. When I check out my facebook feed, I find these same things you do — and I feel like a fraction of the person I was before picking up my phone to “check”. All this to say, “I AGREE”. And it’s great to see you back to your self… at least enough to write a bit for us.

  2. M

    I always enjoy reading your posts. You make me smile!

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